* This week’s show started with a cold open to LARAT’s owner and promoter, Angus Skaaland, standing inside the ring with a microphone in hand. He thanked the Austin fans for coming back, and for bringing friends, and encouraged everyone in the audience to bring their to the next show if they enjoyed what they saw tonight.
* The first match-up was a quick one, fast-paced, and over before it ever really started. Tendo and Yahagi, the Osaka Hate Crime, made quick work of the young Pine Street Posse of Rod Fantastico and Suicidal Youth. The Japanese team showed absolutely no respect in their victory over the kids from Pine Street, USA and kept the match going on a couple of extra minutes just to rub it in how much better they actually were.
* Frank Dylan James was on the interview set, a cold PBR in one hand and a microphone in the other. He was quick and to the point, for once, putting Dusty Griffith on notice. Before he walked off the set and to the ring for his match, The Hillbilly Jesus had this to say: “If’n yew thank yer still hot stuff, bring yer sorry carcass to the finals’a this here tournament so’s Ah c’n slap ya ‘round some ya big hippy baysterd!”
* In a short, violent match, Frank Dylan James destroyed Jaret Haskeer. The young American-Lucha styled grappler never got his feet underneath him before Frank just pummeled him with a rage that hadn’t been seen since his last days in Cascadia. Frank put the exclamation point on the match with the Mountain Top Drop before getting an easy pinfall victory.
* Next was another Texas Heritage Tag League match, pitting last week’s surprise heroes The Firebirds against the street-tough Dirty Rydas. Leary of letting the Firebirds get any of their high impact aerial offence going, Gutshot took the lead in this one and laid waste to the flyers, tagging in Shank Nasty to finish off Phoenix II with their finisher, Dumpin’! After the match both Rydas continued the assault until Phoenix I dove into the ring with a chair to make the save.
* On the interview set Angus Skaaland welcomed Doomsday and Apache, the Hell Riders. Neither man seemed like the kind of fellow you’d want to tangle with in a bar-fight, and when the conversation steered toward the Dirty Rydas, Doomsday assured everyone listening that: “The only ridin’ them two wiggers are gonna do when we get our hands on ‘em is gonna be in a God D*mn hearse!”
* In a surprisingly athletic and back and forth match, Thom Rhodes made a name to himself by pushing the former Iron Crown Heavyweight Champion in the early portion of the match. Thom even went as far as getting a couple of near falls on him. The LARIAT fans were into the match and it seemed that Rhodes was growing on them until he made the rookie mistake of posing after taking Griffith off of his feet with a running Shoulder Block. Griffith was up before Rhodes knew any better, and as Thom turned he was met with a merciless rising knee to the gut, which was the precursor to the Northern Lights Bomb and the pinfall.
* Following his destruction of Thom Rhodes, the face of pro-wrestling Dusty Griffth got on the mic to address his old friend and new rival Frank Dylan James... “I don't really care what your problem with me is... You want to fight, good, so do I. You want to get this done in the finals, that's fine by me... You show up and I'll be there to whoop you some more!”
* Up next was another match for points in the Tag League as Superior FT took on the bruisers Apache and Doomsday. This one started out slow, with Grendel and Garrett controlling the pace of the match and wrestling on the mat, keeping the two behemoths from being able to exert their will. In the end the match spilled outside of the ring where the Hell Riders were at home and they took it to their much more experienced opponents, but it would be all for naught as the referee counted all four men out and called the match. Each team would collect three points, but the idea of being counted out didn’t sit well with anyone involved and they brawled all the way out of the ringside area.
* In a strange turn of events the Lonestar Television Champion, Rich Mahogany, made his way to the ring first. He took his sweet time, though, handing out roses to the Ladies at ringside and being sure to take his time gyrating in front of them. Once inside the ring he took a microphone and talked about how awesome and sexy he was for about five minutes before getting to the point: “Listen here, daddy-o! I don’t know who this big redneck idiot Wyatt Bronson thinks he is, but I’m about to show him just exactly why The Love Machine has got the gold, and all he’s got is barbecue breath!”
*Bronson was out quickly, brandishing his bull-rope and cowbell. Rich jumped out of the ring, screaming into the microphone: “Nobody said ANYTHING about a COWBELL!” The referee intervened and took the rope from Wyatt and the match was on. For nearly ten minutes the Lonestar Television Champion ran from his challenger. He was in the ropes, diving out of the ring, and running around screaming like a girl every time Bronson got within three feet of him. There were a couple of extended periods of action, starting with Mahogany thumbing Bronson in the eye, or kicking him below the belt, but the Texas legend could barely get any offense of his own in without “The Love Machine” either weaseling his way out of the ring or cheating to gain the upper-hand. The end came when Mahogany mule-kicked Bronson in the crotch right in front of the referee to get out of a bear-hug, and Mahogany was out of the ring quicker than greased lightening to collect his title, which he retained through disqualification. Inside the ring Bronson was livid, kicking the ropes and even getting in the face of the referee.
* After the main event Angus Skaaland made his way back out to the ring. It was his sad duty to inform everyone that the next week’s show had been pre-empted due to several of the local stations having already promised that time-slot to the University of Texas baseball team. He went on to say that All-Stars of Wrestling would return on the following Saturday for a July 4th extravaganza and the continuation of both the Texas Heritage Tag League and the Pride of Texas Heavyweight Title Tournament. He also wanted to thank LARIAT’s newest affiliate, and only major sponsor, The E-Wrestling Torch. He had this to say about the wrestling news site: “Those guys at the Torch really understand today’s wrestling product, and they’re doing a hell of a lot of good, especially for us here at Pro-Wrestling LARIAT! Be paying attention overe there, because sooner rather than later yours truly will be writing columns and pitching in to make their product even better!”
06/20/09 @ The Wrestle-Plex [168 fans]
1. Osaka Hate Crime def. Pine Street Posse (4:58)
2. Frank Dylan James def. Jaret Haskeer (5:02)
3. The Dirty Rydas def. The Firebirds (6:33)
4. Dusty Griffith def. Thom Rhodes (8:15)
5. Superior FT draw The Hell Riders (7:56)
6. Wyatt Bronson def. Rich Mahogany (9:13)
